You’re ready to launch, to put your creative ideas out into the world, to get your rear in gear. It’s time.
And then – not again(!) – the spinning begins.
I can’t do it yet. It’s not ready.
Who thought this was a good idea?
I need to fix the video. That wording sucks.
Those colors are awful.
The font? Crap, who picked that font. Am I out of my mind?
By now you’ve spun so much you need someone to hold your hair back and you sure as heck have talked yourself right out of progress.
Don’t Be A Thrasher
All this activity is what Seth Godin refers to thrashing. Thrashing happens at the end of a project, just before launch, when all the scared parts of our brain stand up and scream, “You don’t know what the hell you’re doing!”
If we’re not careful, we will start changing things, making new decisions, undoing what’s already been done, and stalling. Forward movement becomes sideways, wonky movement and we get in our own way.
I’ve been thrashing around like a blindfolded crazy person on roller skates, unsure of where I was going or even where I wanted to go with my projects. I’ve been listening to the ‘ole lizard brain sing her tunes; you don’t know what you’re doing, you’re crazy, blah blah blah.
Change Happens When The Need Is Greater Than The Fear
Then, just like that: The need got to be greater than the fear.
The need to move forward, to start, to make things different got to be more important than the stories I was telling myself that caused Atkins Thrashdom 2010. (I like to name the things that bug me. Some names I can repeat…)
The roller skates and blindfold are gone, traded for running shoes, a Harley (this would be a metaphorical one), and a Life Is Good ball cap that goes especially well with my Dr. Pepper pajama pants.
ProsperHer is up and going. I invite you to come along for the ride. It’s gonna be damn fun.
If you are thrashing do this:
1) own it – thrashing isn’t bad. It’s serving a purpose.
2) figure out what the purpose of it is – to keep you safe? to keep you still? to keep you from doing something you really don’t want to do?
3) if you’re ready to stop thrashing, stop your sucky thinking in it’s tracks and figure out what you need. Yes, it’s ok for you to need, Gertrude. You’re allowed. Own that, too.
Change happens when the need is greater than the fear, so GO. Figure out what you need, what you want.
Make your life move like you want it to. And don’t forget to own your power or someone else will.
Want to comment? Go for it. Tell about a time when you made change that got you past spinny, thrashing fear. Inquiring, brilliant ProsperHer minds want to know…
Martha, You’re a rock star! So excited to see your launch official. I love that you serve as a model for what you write about.
You say, “Tell about a time when you made change that got you past spinny, thrashing fear.” My answer: When I finally quit my soul-sucking job just over a year ago. I agonized about it for three months, working myself into a total tizzy about getting the timing “right.” Finally I just knew it was time and I took the plunge. Freaky scary and wonderful. I hold that in my mind as a great memory of how I “just know” when it’s the right time.
Look forward to the great things this site will have to offer!!
You inspire me, woman! Love your post. Still working PRN for Methodist early shift daily and just moved into a new office for my private practice. I know all about spinning and thrashing. Scared of the GRE and scared of applying for the PsyD program. I keep thinking “I’m too old to go back to school. My memory has been menoPAUSED”. But then I remember that I can have a degree in 5 yrs or I can wait forever…..and regret in 5 yrs that I didn’t at least try. No matter what, follow your dreams and your gut and don’t ever settle for being unsatisfied! Look forward to reading more. Congrats on your site!
Hey, Mary Dom. Great to hear from you. Sounds like things are movin’ and groovin’ for you. ‘My memory has been menoPAUSED’ cracked me up. If you can make jokes like that, I’m not worried about your GRE taking/passing skills or your ability to finish school. YOU CAN DO IT!!! – but you know that already!
Keep me posted.
Big decision to quit a job that feeds your bank account but not your soul. Good. For. You.
I suspect we could all stand to pay a little more attention to the ‘just knowing’ part of ourselves, I know I could. In fact, that will be what I look for today – places where my knowing/intuition is speaking up and wants me to pay attention. Thanks for insight. Have a super day – MJA
Hi Martha
I love this article. It is so relateable and completely reminds me of what happens when I write a blog post, newsletter, or do something creative and fun for my peeps -then I start thrashing….after exhaustion I launch. After reading this I will identify the thrashing sooner and possibly get past it quicker. Which means I can launch with less thrashing …yay!
That would be amazing!
Ned
http://www.nedrios.com
Yahoo! Awareness is a beautiful thing isn’t is?! Thanks for posting, Ned. Be well.
Martha, yes. I’m finally realizing my thrashing has been serving me. It’s been getting me ready…that became very clear this week. And it enforces what we hear and say all the time ‘we are exactly where we are supposed to be.’ What’s exciting to me is that the awareness we get as we thrash about feeds the need…creates a longing. The longing becomes huge with purpose. And then, funny thing, the fear starts to quiet down. As you say, the need becomes greater than the fear. Thank you for putting this process perfectly into words…and you’re right, it IS gonna be damn fun!